|Writing Feedback [23,070] - page 229 of 385|
|Some people think that parents should teach children ; INTRODUCTION
Writing Feedbackbehrooz_00133 - Oct 15, 2013 / behrooz_00133 - Oct 16, 2013
|IELTS: more and more pollution and waste are created everyday
7 - As this is one of your body paragraph, I think you should focus on one consequence of pollution and...
Writing Feedbackleoking - Oct 14, 2013 / MisterWandering - Oct 15, 2013
|Ielts topic: Is it justified for the entertainers to earn huge salaries?
8 - Sure :) ... are we impressed or shocked? ....lol... This line needs improvement; Nowadays, we often...
Writing Feedbackthuy duong - Oct 10, 2013 / dumi - Oct 15, 2013
|Banning of Smoking in Public Places; 'smoke free environment'
6 - Hi tishca2013 - You cannot expect others to provide feedbacks on your writing when you post your essays...
Writing FeedbackVashAng - Oct 14, 2013 / dumi - Oct 15, 2013
|TOEFL WRITING: In 20 years from now on, students will not use printed books any more.
6 - As a result, somebodysome people states that, students will not use printed books any more after 20 years ...
Writing FeedbackKaren Zhang - Oct 11, 2013 / dumi - Oct 15, 2013
|Why tommy douglas is the greatest Canadian?
2 - In my view, Tommy Douglas was the most outstanding Canadian although many may vote for Terry Fox. Fox,...
Writing Feedbacksheryarali - Oct 14, 2013 / dumi - Oct 15, 2013
|Integrated Writing Task; Research Writing and Quotation
3 - Is this for TOEFL Integrated writing? Mention the purpose in the subject so that other can provide you with...
Writing Feedbacknephop - Oct 9, 2013 / dumi - Oct 15, 2013
|Studying abroad has become a very common phenomenon in the modern world - globalisation result
Writing Feedbackdewploy - Oct 10, 2013 / dewploy - Oct 15, 2013
|Adam Smithwas was one of the key figures of the Scottish Enlightenment -KEY IDEAS
3 - Adam Smith is best known for two classic works 1. The Theory of Moral Sentiments 2. An Inquiry into...
Writing Feedbackleslav - Oct 8, 2013 / eventzkaze - Oct 14, 2013
|TOEFL: Which do you prefer: do only what you already do well, or not.
2 - When you use use the word "you" and "your" alot it sounds like you are accusing the person. Try...
Writing Feedbackyusukexo - Oct 14, 2013 / anoopam - Oct 14, 2013
|"wake up, sleepy head!"; My Memoir : Art is silence of thougths
3 - You should organize your into smaller paragraphs; the paragraphs you wrote are huge. Furthermore, you have a few grammatical...
Writing Feedbackqn1144 - Oct 2, 2013 / zazros - Oct 14, 2013
|[TOEFL] Always better to do the shopping in the big shopping mall
3 - You summarize your statement at the end of each paragraph. Like: It clarifies your position and helps...
Writing Feedbacksimonlee726 - Oct 13, 2013 / yusukexo - Oct 14, 2013
|TOEFL writing: governments should spend as much money as possible on IT?
3 - I really appreciate your comment. It'll definitely help me improve my essay and a writing skill....
Writing Feedbackyusukexo - Oct 11, 2013 / yusukexo - Oct 14, 2013
|New restaurant? My neighborhood would become more prosperous and people living here would be happier
5 - In this set up, all the restaurants would need to change their current strategies in attracting clients for...
Writing Feedbackmusicariel - Oct 12, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 14, 2013
|Family environment is the base for the children to be good members of society
3 - The family environment is the base for the children that parents should work hard to raise their children on...
Writing FeedbackNadaish - Oct 14, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 14, 2013
|IELTS: 'optimum utilization of available resources' - Inequality between rich and poor nations
6 - Thank you everyone for your suggestions. Please suggest me an introductory line for this task. I am not able...
Writing FeedbackJoohi24 - Oct 12, 2013 / Joohi24 - Oct 14, 2013
|IELTS; rejecting public educational system would not be better
4 - Yes.... both Pahan and MisterWandering are trying to align your introduction with the task requirements. I remember providing...
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Oct 11, 2013 / dumi - Oct 14, 2013
|The Teachability of Virtue; It is argued that virtue is much the same
2 - The topic of piety, virtue and what it means to make a good citizen are central ideas discussed in...
Writing FeedbackSpatchie - Oct 3, 2013 / cgcbjunpark - Oct 14, 2013
|Work place or research updates will help universities in showing direction to educate students
9 - Hi dumi, Anyways once again thanks a lot to dumi and pahan, that was a great learning experience. I...
Writing Feedbackshiva sai - Oct 13, 2013 / shiva sai - Oct 14, 2013
|IELTS WRITING TASK 1: THE TABLE/ Actual Vs Estimated house construction
5 - Likewise, 8100 houses were estimated to be constructed in the Central England, which was half the figure for...
Writing FeedbackKalyn17992 - Oct 11, 2013 / MisterWandering - Oct 13, 2013
|IELTS writing task 2- Doing the same job for whole the life or changing it frequently
Writing Feedbackah_zafari - Aug 10, 2013 / johnyjin - Oct 13, 2013
|IELTS 9 Test 4 - Languages die out every year......... Is this a positive trend?
6 - Oh, there should be one more sentence in the introduction. I am inclined to support fewer languages. ...
Writing Feedbackstrongwillow - Oct 11, 2013 / strongwillow - Oct 13, 2013
|[toefl task] TELEPHONE or TELEVISION? Which one is more effective in people's life?
8 - Copying others comments is against forum rules and such users would be suspended. .... smart point.... there...
Writing Feedbackaster0224 - Oct 5, 2013 / dumi - Oct 13, 2013
|IELTS; I'm on holiday and ask my friend to take care of my house and pet
4 - As dumi has already commented, you need to be more humble when asking help. So, you need to rephrase...
Writing Feedbackashat165 - Oct 2, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 13, 2013
|IELTS: Task 2 Gender differences in work
2 - Hey... I think you have posted the wrong essay... your topic talks about children obeying rules and your essay...
Writing Feedbackpijiuwdw - Oct 13, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 13, 2013
|IELTS Writing Task 1: Graphs ; Actual number of houses constructed in UK 2002
Writing FeedbackJoohi24 - Oct 11, 2013 / Joohi24 - Oct 12, 2013
|'International Baccalaureate senior' - Tell us about yourself
Writing FeedbackElementary11 - Oct 12, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 12, 2013
|Personal enjoyment? Everyone is working as a diligent worker for the family.
9 - Dear pahan I meant happy :D:D:D I will continue to take part here because it helped me alot. and...
Writing Feedbackcgcbjunpark - Oct 8, 2013 / marmaria - Oct 12, 2013
|IELTS: who should responsible for elderly?
6 - On the other hand, people should act more responsibly when they are young and energetic and should save...
Writing Feedbackleoking - Oct 10, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 11, 2013
|IELTS - Course of study that has no direct employment opportunities serves no purpose
5 - Thanks Dumi for the feedback. I now understand the issue with words of the kind that you've spotted. Regarding...
Writing Feedbackieltsp - Oct 6, 2013 / ieltsp - Oct 11, 2013
|TOEFL- The opinions of celebrities are more important to younger people?
Writing Feedbacksimonlee726 - Oct 11, 2013 / dumi - Oct 11, 2013
|Essay: Schools problems with student behavior.
Writing Feedbackmerurino - Oct 10, 2013 / dumi - Oct 11, 2013
|I grow up in Jiquilpan Michoacán; My New Life
Writing Feedbackoscar cazares - Oct 2, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 11, 2013
|Having fewer languages is a good thing?
9 - .... this section does not convey your idea clearly. I cannot really get what you try to mean...
Writing Feedbackhkahal - Oct 2, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 11, 2013
|Doing the same job for whole life, is it challenging?
2 - As per the human nature , no matter how lucrativeinteresting and well paid th e job is, people may...
Writing Feedbacktishca2013 - Oct 10, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 11, 2013
|[TOEFL] What makes a good neighbor? - Optimistic people
Writing Feedbackyushan - Oct 10, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 10, 2013
|If I had a chance to go back in time, I would like to meet Albert Einstein
Writing Feedbacksomething - Oct 10, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 10, 2013
|My favorite room is my study because it keeps my memories alive!
Writing FeedbackNora_Toxic - Oct 6, 2013 / Nora_Toxic - Oct 10, 2013
|talk about a photograph or painting you have seen that was memorable.
Writing Feedbackmahsa kh - Sep 30, 2013 / dumi - Oct 10, 2013
|Eating at restaurant vs eating at home; Which is better?
4 - "Those who have no time for healthy eating will sooner or later have to find time for illness." -...
Writing Feedbackkrishnadeo - Oct 8, 2013 / krishnadeo - Oct 10, 2013
|IELTS; As computers are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role
3 - What is the reason you try to tell that can justify your position stated in the introduction? I...
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Oct 10, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 10, 2013
|IELTS; youth are experimenting with both legal and illegal drugs, and at an increasingly
3 - These are good starting sentences for your paragraphs... Let's do this on a different approach... I...
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Oct 9, 2013 / gmad06 - Oct 9, 2013
|We should look at computers advantages and research to utilize them in a good manner.
6 - Thanks...you will have your turn soon. Just keep on writing and practice proofreading..Cheers....
Writing Feedbackfahadbd - Oct 7, 2013 / gmad06 - Oct 9, 2013
|IELTS; Popular events help ease international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions
Writing FeedbackBALOCH - Oct 8, 2013 / BALOCH - Oct 9, 2013
|IELTS - Do the same thing and Avoid Changes; GOOD or BAD?
4 - .... this sentence does not make sense.... I think you have made some typos. Is this what you...
Writing FeedbackWattanhi - Oct 9, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 9, 2013
|Media should present diverse aspects of our life, so like bad guys sometimes live happy
Writing Feedbackjugajoa - Oct 9, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 9, 2013
|Fair view on PROSTITUTION ; Grammar/ Structure
Writing FeedbackPeterdo1988 - Oct 9, 2013 / dumi - Oct 9, 2013
|IELTS; Why do we need music?
5 - To much 'telling the reader' in the essay. Let the essay convey its own ideas through itself. The sentences...
Writing Feedbacknovembernqk - Oct 7, 2013 / OchoCinco85 - Oct 8, 2013
|'solution for world hunger' or ' space exploration'?- Which project do you choose and why?
NEW - Your candid feedback is highly appreciated. Thanks in advance for the help. Prompt: A science laboratory in Britain...
Writing Feedbackjondoe - Oct 8, 2013 / — -
|IELTS; People who have committed a crime should always be in jail ?
Writing Feedbackjoylabx - Oct 6, 2013 / dumi - Oct 8, 2013
|IELTS ; The only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university
Writing FeedbackKjerry - Oct 7, 2013 / dumi - Oct 8, 2013
|The concept "translation" has been changing during the last century; TRANSLATION PROCESS
Writing FeedbackMarina123 - Oct 5, 2013 / joylabx - Oct 8, 2013
|IELTS : What contributes for a GOOD JOB? University education or job experience?
6 - Hi hisho, For me your essay looks monotonous. Your ideas are circling around what is it like to...
Writing Feedbackhisho - Oct 4, 2013 / gmad06 - Oct 7, 2013
|IELTS Writing Task 2 : Modern Technology make parents have no time for their children
Writing Feedbacklilyvn1009 - Oct 3, 2013 / Kjerry - Oct 7, 2013
|You successfully passed a job interview. You are expected to start on November 15, but you
Writing Feedbackfextora - Oct 5, 2013 / dumi - Oct 7, 2013
|Should you start a career or enter university at 18?
2 - good introduction :) ... I guess he would become an experienced worker rather than a qualified...
Writing FeedbackElizabethAsking - Oct 6, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 6, 2013
|Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because
3 - .... this sentence needs improvements in its presentation; To begin with, the world today is becoming closer and...
Writing Feedbackabbas8158 - Oct 2, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 6, 2013
|The fewer language the world have, the more convenient we can live our life
3 - has become / is becoming The numbers of international students coming from overseas for studies are...
Writing Feedbacklilyvn1009 - Oct 4, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 6, 2013
|TOEFL writing 2 essey: Big city vs small town
4 - Let's take your first body paragraph - In body paragraphs you should give reasons to justify your...
Writing Feedbackhosein_g - Oct 5, 2013 / Pahan - Oct 6, 2013
|TOEFL (task II): compare / contrast " learning from book or experience" ?
Writing FeedbackReshaidNasser - Sep 18, 2013 / Nora_Toxic - Oct 6, 2013
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